Lessons from my boys

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One of the most beautiful aspects of being a mom is how the Lord uses these lives to dramatically alter yours. There is something so sweet in caring for a child when you realize God is caring for you similarly. The Lord never ceases to amaze me every single day, how He chooses to use my children to teach me. I’ve been reflecting recently about all that my children have used by God to reveal to me, and I had this knowing that I had to share. May these small, but big lessons bless you the way I have been blessed by them.

When I was pregnant with my first son, the pregnancy was delightful. I began learning about the joy of expectancy. All I could do was delight in wondering how incredible it would be to actually look into the eyes of my son and get to speak life into his spirit and enjoy the moments of our days together. I could not stop imagining his giggle, his purposes, his life and thanking God for getting the honor of being a part of it all.

In life, we sometimes get to experience the joy of expectancy. There are things coming that we are looking forward to and they help us to keep going. They help us remember why we do this life thing everyday. They help us pull through the muck when it feels like it would be easier to just stay stuck for a while. Having aspects to life which we are joyfully expecting is a gift- a good gift- from our Father to encourage us to stay the course and run with endurance. What are you joyfully expecting? (If you feel like there is nothing, ask God to open something up for you- a dream, hope, or passion that will get you going again! He has plans and purposes for you!)

When I was pregnant with my younger son, the pregnancy was downright hard and painful. I began to understand that while what I am expecting, waiting upon, and excited for is wonderful- sometimes the season of expectancy can be very painful. The pain of the waiting can often times be the very preparation we will need to be able to handle what we are awaiting, once we get it. During this pregnancy I learned to rest in God’s power and timing, I learned to trust and worship in the waiting. And now, juggling two children, I am growing in understanding the importance of all of those lessons- for I would not be able to raise these little boys into men who will love Jesus in my own strength and power- but truly by resting in God’s power and timing. We all have times of waiting that is painful- but I am learning to believe and recognize this- almost every single beautiful and valuable gift I have ever been given in life, has come wrapped in some sort of pain and/or suffering. Now I am asking the Lord to give me eyes to see the gift while it is still painful.

One of the most profound truths I have ever learned, came as a result of becoming a mother. I was so moved by how deeply I loved my sweet boy- how much I wanted to meet all of his needs, and give him everything I could possibly think he would want. As these feelings and desires of a mother’s heart were becoming a deeply rooted part of my identity, the Lord began to ask me some questions.
“Jenna, what did he do to earn that kind of love from you?”
To which I replied, “Nothing, he hasn’t been able to DO anything for me. I just love him because he is mine.”
“Jenna, why would you want to give him good gifts?”
“Simply because of my deep love for him.”
Then He began to minister to my heart.
“Daughter, you do not have to do anything to earn my love. You see how much you love him, imagine, just imagine now, how much I love you- simply because you are Mine. You do not have to do anything to get my love or even to deserve the good gifts I give you. You are Mine and I love you.”

This truth changed everything for me! Never before could I have understood the heart of a parent. The deep desire to bless your children out of this overwhelming love for them. This desire doesn’t seem to change with circumstances- it remains, and even grows when circumstances are harder. Loving my children has helped me receive the Father’s love for me personally.

And recently with my little one, who is fully dependent upon me for everything he needs to stay alive, I am constantly reminded of how dependent I am upon the Lord for everything I need to stay alive. Before my son has a need, I am doing the work to prepare what he will need. As I do this work for him, the Lord reminds me that also, there are things I am going to need and He is preparing it all for me now, even before I know I need it. When I see that something will hurt my child, I go before him to remove what could harm him, or I put an appropriate form of protection on him, so that even though the threat is still there, it won’t be able to touch him. As I take these steps to protect him, the Lord says to me- I am removing what has been meant to harm you- and the ones you have to face, I am giving you everything you need to face them without being destroyed.

If I am an imperfect woman who is capable of great love, imagine how much bigger the love from a PERFECT GOD is.

I encourage you today- consider what it is like to be a child. Consider how children truly expect that they will have their needs and desires fully met. Consider how children have no problem being honest about what they see and experience and how it makes them feel. Consider with me, how children have no problem asking for exactly what they want.

Out of that place, let’s go to God simply as His child. Let’s take off all the big-fat adult worry and climb into His lap. Let’s ask for what we need, and for what we want. Let’s find out where the provision which we believe has been prepared, has been placed. Let’s find out which way to go and where the protection is. Let’s see with new eyes what we can joyfully expect and embrace the waiting as a gift of perfect preparation.

You are fully loved- just because you are His child. You do not have to do or be anything but you- to have this love. He who created you, loves you fully. Choose to receive that love today!

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About layeredhearts

I am just a woman who would be nothing without my Jesus. He rescued me, and continues to deliver me. He renews my mind daily through His written Word, His spoken Word, and the Body of Christ. I have found freedom, joy, liberty, and strength in Him. In Him, and through Him, I fully believe that ALL THINGS ARE POSSIBLE. I have surrendered my need to understand and have entered into a place of complete trust. I am a woman who chooses daily to say, "Yes, Lord, I will follow."

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