This is just a quick word on denial- and the scriptures to overcome the desire to “escape” into it! Praying this blesses someone- as the Word of God has and continues to dramatically alter and upgrade my life!
The absolute first step to overcoming denial is to admit what is happening is actually happening and stop pretending like nothing ‘really bad’ is going on. The need for denial is a self-protection mechanism which gives a lie to the person, “this is too big for you- there is nothing you can do anyways- in order to keep the ‘peace’ just keep quiet.”
But here is what is true- nothing is too hard for God- for with Him all things are possible- and there is hope in the blood that was shed for us. There is no peace outside of the Prince of Peace. We begin overcoming the need to escape into denial (which actually hurts everyone you are trying to protect) when we invite our Prince of Peace into the chaos. When we seek Him for wisdom- when we surrender our need to control the outcome because we know we can trust Him ultimately- but we cannot really trust ourselves. We can trust in His ways because He is God and we are not- and His ways are higher- taking His road always gives us an upgrade- we become more like Him. We can speak the truth of God’s Word in the Authority we have been given in Christ Jesus to the father of lies- and at the very name of Jesus, he has to flee. The only ground the enemy can take in our lives, and of those we have loved, is where we come into agreement with the message he is speaking. To break free we must make agreements with God’s Kingdom, with what is true, and break agreements and actions that follow with the kingdom of darkness. This is a process. But denial- is a lie- rooted in fear of loss. Any fear means we have not allowed God’s love to come into that place and we are still grasping for control.
We have an enemy-it is satan- not each other.
Ephesians 6:12
New International Version (NIV)
12 For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms.
Light and Darkness cannot co-habitat.
1 John 1:5-9
5 This is the message we have heard from him and declare to you: God is light; in him there is no darkness at all. 6 If we claim to have fellowship with him and yet walk in the darkness, we lie and do not live out the truth. 7 But if we walk in the light, as he is in the light, we have fellowship with one another, and the blood of Jesus, his Son, purifies us from all[b] sin.
8 If we claim to be without sin, we deceive ourselves and the truth is not in us. 9 If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness. 10 If we claim we have not sinned, we make him out to be a liar and his word is not in us.
We need God to show us our transgressions, daily.
Psalm 139:23-24
New Living Translation (NLT)
23 Search me, O God, and know my heart;
test me and know my anxious thoughts.
24 Point out anything in me that offends you,
and lead me along the path of everlasting life.
We can discern the condition of our hearts by the fruit of our life.
Galatians 5: 16-26 Living by the Spirit’s Power
16 So I say, let the Holy Spirit guide your lives. Then you won’t be doing what your sinful nature craves. 17 The sinful nature wants to do evil, which is just the opposite of what the Spirit wants. And the Spirit gives us desires that are the opposite of what the sinful nature desires. These two forces are constantly fighting each other, so you are not free to carry out your good intentions. 18 But when you are directed by the Spirit, you are not under obligation to the law of Moses.
19 When you follow the desires of your sinful nature, the results are very clear: sexual immorality, impurity, lustful pleasures, 20 idolatry, sorcery, hostility, quarreling, jealousy, outbursts of anger, selfish ambition, dissension, division, 21 envy, drunkenness, wild parties, and other sins like these. Let me tell you again, as I have before, that anyone living that sort of life will not inherit the Kingdom of God.
22 But the Holy Spirit produces this kind of fruit in our lives: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, 23 gentleness, and self-control. There is no law against these things!
24 Those who belong to Christ Jesus have nailed the passions and desires of their sinful nature to his cross and crucified them there. 25 Since we are living by the Spirit, let us follow the Spirit’s leading in every part of our lives. 26 Let us not become conceited, or provoke one another, or be jealous of one another.
When He reveals darkness, we can confess and repent and be cleansed and restored to righteousness.
1 John 1:9
New Living Translation (NLT)
9 But if we confess our sins to him, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all wickedness.
We then are free to love, because He first loved us- undeservingly.
1 John 4:16-20
16 We know how much God loves us, and we have put our trust in his love.
God is love, and all who live in love live in God, and God lives in them. 17 And as we live in God, our love grows more perfect. So we will not be afraid on the day of judgment, but we can face him with confidence because we live like Jesus here in this world.
18 Such love has no fear, because perfect love expels all fear. If we are afraid, it is for fear of punishment, and this shows that we have not fully experienced his perfect love. 19 We love each other[b] because he loved us first.
20 If someone says, “I love God,” but hates a Christian brother or sister,[c] that person is a liar; for if we don’t love people we can see, how can we love God, whom we cannot see?21 And he has given us this command: Those who love God must also love their Christian brothers and sisters.[d]
We show this love by knowing we are not better than anyone- we are simply In Christ, and we work in love to bring one another to the understanding of who they are in Christ.
Philippians 2:3-5
New Living Translation (NLT)
3 Don’t be selfish; don’t try to impress others. Be humble, thinking of others as better than yourselves. 4 Don’t look out only for your own interests, but take an interest in others, too.
5 You must have the same attitude that Christ Jesus had.
We understand that our enemy is the father or lies and wants nothing more than to bring destruction.
John 8:42-50
New Living Translation (NLT)
42 Jesus told them, “If God were your Father, you would love me, because I have come to you from God. I am not here on my own, but he sent me. 43 Why can’t you understand what I am saying? It’s because you can’t even hear me! 44 For you are the children of your father the devil, and you love to do the evil things he does. He was a murderer from the beginning. He has always hated the truth, because there is no truth in him. When he lies, it is consistent with his character; for he is a liar and the father of lies. 45 So when I tell the truth, you just naturally don’t believe me! 46 Which of you can truthfully accuse me of sin? And since I am telling you the truth, why don’t you believe me? 47 Anyone who belongs to God listens gladly to the words of God. But you don’t listen because you don’t belong to God.”
48 The people retorted, “You Samaritan devil! Didn’t we say all along that you were possessed by a demon?”
49 “No,” Jesus said, “I have no demon in me. For I honor my Father—and you dishonor me. 50 And though I have no wish to glorify myself, God is going to glorify me. He is the true judge.
We overcome satan by the blood of the Lamb and the word of our testimony.
Revelation 12:11
New Living Translation (NLT)
11 And they have defeated him by the blood of the Lamb
and by their testimony.
And they did not love their lives so much
that they were afraid to die.
And we lay down our flesh, pick up our cross, follow Jesus, and agree with His heart which is that none should perish, but ALL would have everlasting life in Christ Jesus!
Matthew 16:24-27
New Living Translation (NLT)
24 Then Jesus said to his disciples, “If any of you wants to be my follower, you must turn from your selfish ways, take up your cross, and follow me. 25 If you try to hang on to your life, you will lose it. But if you give up your life for my sake, you will save it. 26 And what do you benefit if you gain the whole world but lose your own soul?[a] Is anything worth more than your soul? 27 For the Son of Man will come with his angels in the glory of his Father and will judge all people according to their deeds.
2 Peter 3:9
Amplified Bible (AMP)
9 The Lord does not delay and is not tardy or slow about what He promises, according to some people’s conception of slowness, but He is long-suffering (extraordinarily patient) toward you, not desiring that any should perish, but that all should turn to repentance.
So our lives journey and every aspect of it should align with our call to GO and make disciples of all nations- and to Love God and love others!
Matthew 28:19
New Living Translation (NLT)
19 Therefore, go and make disciples of all the nations,[a]baptizing them in the name of the Father and the Son and the Holy Spirit.
Matthew 22:36-40
New Living Translation (NLT)
36 “Teacher, which is the most important commandment in the law of Moses?”
37 Jesus replied, “‘You must love the Lord your God with all your heart, all your soul, and all your mind.’[a] 38 This is the first and greatest commandment. 39 A second is equally important: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’[b]40 The entire law and all the demands of the prophets are based on these two commandments.”
And we must understand in the new covenant what Jesus defines as murder, adultery etc. It is all about where our heart is- which is conceived in the mind.
Matthew 5:21-22
Amplified Bible (AMP)
21 You have heard that it was said to the men of old, You shall not kill, and whoever kills shall be [a]liable to andunable to escape the punishment imposed by the court.
22 But I say to you that everyone who continues to be[b]angry with his brother or harbors malice (enmity of heart) against him shall be [c]liable to and unable to escape the punishment imposed by the court; and whoever speaks contemptuously and insultingly to his brother shall be [d]liable to and unable to escape the punishment imposed by the Sanhedrin, and whoever says, You [e]cursed fool! [You empty-headed idiot!] shall be[f]liable to and unable to escape the hell (Gehenna) of fire.
Knowing this- and our sin nature- we are to commit to the constant renewing of our mind to become like Christ- to be able to fulfill the call to love.
Romans 12:2
Amplified Bible (AMP)
2 Do not be conformed to this world (this age), [fashioned after and adapted to its external, superficial customs], but be transformed (changed) by the [entire] renewal of your mind [by its new ideals and its new attitude], so that you may prove [for yourselves] what is the good and acceptable and perfect will of God, even the thing which is good and acceptable and perfect [in His sight for you].
2 Corinthians 10:3-5
Amplified Bible (AMP)
3 For though we walk (live) in the flesh, we are not carrying on our warfare according to the flesh and using mere human weapons.
4 For the weapons of our warfare are not physical [weapons of flesh and blood], but they are mighty before God for the overthrow and destruction of strongholds,
5 [Inasmuch as we] refute arguments and theories andreasonings and every proud and lofty thing that sets itself up against the [true] knowledge of God; and we lead every thought and purpose away captive into the obedience of Christ (the Messiah, the Anointed One),
And as we do this, we will be quick to repent, and quick to forgive others. This is the only way to live- the only true life. Everything outside of the Word of God is rooted in fear, pride, or denial.
WE CAN OVERCOME! We do not have to be defined by the way we have always done things. We can choose today to break the destructive cycles and replace them with constructive cycles and move FORWARD! And trust me- every small step in the right direction leads to the world changing! And God loves the world! He said you were worth it- believe Him- I do!